These are some quotes from a member known as UtahCrip on a forum I visit. They're pretty damn funny.

On Gun Control

"I feel like a real man regardless if I'm strapped. I just happen to always be strapped."

"This country was built on packing heat."

"Fuck out of here. I'll fight a dude but sometimes you just got to clap somebody."

On Relationships

"I told my moms I was going to go blow out some hoes back. All she asked was if I had some jimmy hats. I told her yeah but I hit it raw. Shit, elementary school was some good time."

"You act like it's hard to pick up 13 year old girls and fatties. If I stopped down to your level, I'd get more than 3 broads. Thankfully I like my hoes of age and looking right.

I aint down with that bullshit[monogamy]. I mean how you only going to bang one broad when they is so many good looking bitches out there. You must be crazy, cuz.

[Sexual Fantasies]"Aight peep this. So I'm chilling with the homies. Next thing this dime comes out of no where. We talking fine face, nice tigoles, and phat ass. So she pushes my homies out the way and gives me dome on the spot. Next thing a cop pulls up and get out of his ride. Before he starts hating, she pulls out my glock and shoots the pig. Then I hit it from the bacc. That's some real shit right there. For real something really romantic and shit.

On Learning

"Why aint you learn something more useful in them 10 years. The hood aint checking for sword fights. Seriously, call me the next time you get into a 3 musketeers type swordfight, cuz.

I really don't get that shit. For real people act like they are smarter with a degree. Yet when they graduate, they in debt and having troubles getting a job. Shit I barely graduated high school and I stay getting paid. The streets taught me and I aint have to take no caclulus classes. For current college students, I'm sorry but you getting pimped by education.

We can't all sling roccs and gang bang, yo. Some of us have to stay on the straight and narrow, otherwise there would be massive inflation in the banging and slanging...and then there would be no money in the drug game...But going to college doesn't mean that you can't cheat the system and do gangsta shit, like stealing food from the campus cafe, or bustin' mental-caps in foo's with your knowledge.

I seriosuly couldn't make this shit up, I had to edit the spelling and stuff like that. But its all his words. You have no idea what kind of pure win this guy is made of.